rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
