We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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