I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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