We're facebook friends in real life
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
