i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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