so explain again why im purple
no
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I think my moral compass just broke
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
