you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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