Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Randomize
