all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
he shaved USA in his pubs
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
