he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
