You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
