Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
