I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
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