Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Randomize
