At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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