Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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