Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize