sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize