Rock
Scissors
Fuck
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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