11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Randomize
