I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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