3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize
