For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
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