My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Come see our sink grown plant.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Randomize
