I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
