What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
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