you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
