He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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