well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Randomize
