Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
