Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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