I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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