Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
