my mouth tastes like poor choices
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
