i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
He kissed a someone with a penis
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Randomize
