conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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