I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
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