Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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