scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
only you would photoshop your dick
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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