White coat. Heels.
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Text me some of your sweat
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
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