dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
