okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Randomize
