She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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