I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
