sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Randomize
