He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Randomize