Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
