Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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