That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
i think im in europe. pls send help
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
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