Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
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